OPEN LETTER TO MY SOON COMING CHILDREN

Dear children,

Darling children of mine, the stalks of my very vine, beauty of my youth, testaments of my existence, how are you doing? How is the shore of  the unknown buried in the waters of my womb treating you? I know you are fine; you cannot be "unfine" for that is a term associated with the realm of the Earth, a realm you are yet to land on. 

Marvelous children, while you wait to explore this space, I would love to, from time to time expose you to the human nature, in order that when you finally arrive, you may not be taken aback. 

Today, I would tell you a story. Once upon a time in my childhood days, I had a friend who switches up on me for no particular reason. This moment, we are playing and laughing, the next moment, she is ignoring me. 

Everytime she did this, confused me would follow her wherever she went, wanting to win her friendship back. Ironically enough, in all the moments I followed her around, I knew I had done nothing to deserve the way she treated me, but my being, being too simple on normal circumstances, found it difficult to understand what she was doing. I kept wanting to win her approval in spite of my own self. Whatever she said, I readily agreed to, whether or not I had a different  opinion, for I feared to do anything that could make her go back to ignoring me. As days went by, I lost myself the more, shrinking myself always to massage her ego. But there was a problem, my spirit was protesting, so that everytime I do this I go back home feeling very awful. Unhappy. 

Then one day, she switched up on me as usual, and I couldn't have it no longer. I said to myself, "you know what, I am done." And so I switched on my cape of toughness, and I said to her, "girl? go to hell."

But suddenly, she stopped misbehaving. In fact, I was more surprised myself because when I decided to match her energy back, I never did it in hope that she could have a rethink, it was simply me refusing to make myself small anymore so she can feel big. And thus, this brings me to the end of my story.

Umu m, now if you have learnt nothing, at least know these: 

First, people will switch up on you without you harming/hurting them. For some, they would do this because they feel threatened, they don't want to feel small by your side so they try to stop this through control method. For lot more, they would do it because they are fighting their own demons. But these ones will always come back when they feel well again. For the rest, they will do it because others control them. This is when you begin to hear things like, "she did nothing to me, but my friend said she is bad. Lest I forget, there are equally people who would switch up on when they feel you aren't their class anymore. That's a human thing, as long as you are doing well for yourself, don't let that bother you. 

Second, don't loose yourself trying to please anybody. When a person is for you, there wouldn't be any need for you to fall so the person can rise. The sky is too large for everybody to fly. This is not to say you cannot compromise for your friends, you can, but when this compromise only comes from you everytime, then there is a problem, and you should probably get out of that thing. Friendship isn't one sided. 

I hope you enjoyed my story?

Ngwanu, ka o di nu mgbe ozo. Ahuru m unu na-anya karisia ihe nile.

With love, 

Mother.

Photo credit: AI Image

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